Clean, fun jokes... the tradition continues

[OzEclipse]

[gregl]

[UlteriorModem]

Apan

[Lady Fraktor]

Feel like a god while doing those small jobs around the home!

[DeanD]

Feel like a god while doing those small jobs around the home!

IMG_5771.jpg

Love it! I just put in an order for one (not entirely tongue-in-cheek) for our Repair Cafe kid's table...

[Ylem]

[KingNothing13]

aAs6rfk.jpg

Always goes to the dog.

[AntennaGuy]

This is the sort of fear that really keeps me awake at night...
https://babylonbee.com/news/man-who-exi ... e-in-shame

[chicagorandy]

[pakarinen]

I was sorting through my closet yesterday, trying on dress pants I used to wear to my office before the lockdown. Something must be weird about my closet because five out of six pairs have shrunk in the waist and don’t fit anymore. Most perplexing!

[Ylem]

[gregl]

I was sorting through my closet yesterday, trying on dress pants I used to wear to my office before the lockdown. Something must be weird about my closet because five out of six pairs have shrunk in the waist and don’t fit anymore. Most perplexing!

And not only that but they are putting less fabric in the waistbands of new pants than they did many years ago. Back then, I measured my waist and it was 34 inches and the pants fit. Today I still have a waist but I have to buy 40-inch waistband pants.

[gregl]

Here's one that was on the Car Talk radio program:
This guy went into his garage in the morning and saw a small puddle under his car. Being particular about maintenance, he bent over and dipped his fingers in it and rubbed them together. The liquid was not slippery, so he knew it wasn't oil. He smelled it and could tell it was not transmission fluid. He tasted it and it was not a sweet taste so he knew it wasn't radiator fluid, and it wasn't a strong acid like battery acid. It was a little dry seeming and only slightly acidic. And then out of the corner of his eye he noticed that the cat had been locked in the garage all night.

[gregl]

[gregl]

[DeanD]

Here's one that was on the Car Talk radio program:
This guy went into his garage in the morning and saw a small puddle under his car. Being particular about maintenance, he bent over and dipped his fingers in it and rubbed them together. The liquid was not slippery, so he knew it wasn't oil. He smelled it and could tell it was not transmission fluid. He tasted it and it was not a sweet taste so he knew it wasn't radiator fluid, and it wasn't a strong acid like battery acid. It was a little dry seeming and only slightly acidic. And then out of the corner of his eye he noticed that the cat had been locked in the garage all night.

Anyone who tastes unknown fluid on the ground deserves what they get!

[gregl]

24 hours in a day...24 beers in a case...coincidence?

[Ylem]

Why did the donut baker retire?


He got tired of the hole business.

I'll see myself out...

[Lady Fraktor]

A sad day, I have just realized my new universal remote control will not in fact control the universe... not even remotely.

[DeanD]

A sad day, I have just realized my new universal remote control will not in fact control the universe... not even remotely.

My universal remote wouldn't even control my TV!